When taking a deep breath seems all one can do

Some changes, unexpected (well, aren't almost all changes unexpected?) have come my way opening up a place in me that is almost as familiar as the back of my hand.  Speaking of the back of my hand, as I was holding my great-grandson Luke a couple of Saturdays ago, I had to marvel at the difference in our hands.  Mine looked like my Mother's used to look and his, well, at four months plus, looked fresh, untested, ready and willing to reach for anything within his grasp.  What an amazing memory-moment!
Anyway, as I was saying, a seemingly small and insignicant change in my Tuesday routine has set me on a new and same old course; dealing with feelings as old as my memory itself.  How do we learn that we are what we do?  Is it a way to gain attention?  A way to be noticed?  A way to lessen the pain of not knowing what is going on while everyone around seems to? 
Now I wonder if I am revealing more of myself than seems reasonable for a blog like this?  One of the members of one of the groups I attend at Common Ground recently announced "This isn't what I signed up for."  Are you feeling that way, dear reader?  If so, you have my permission to be excused.
Or perhaps you are reminded, as I have been, that Life presents the gifts of our experiences just at the very moment we have the time, the place, the resources and the support to move to a place of greater depth and understanding about how we are in the world.  That was one of the hallmarks of my time in a 12-step program and I have relied and trusted that bit of truth ever since.
I love to help out - to see what needs to be done, to do it with or without recognition.  One of our ministers at Common Ground pointed out one time that if any one of us sees a task to be done, then it, obviously, is ours to do.  I took her at her word; well, to be honest, I think that is pretty much the way I operate anyway.  (Pardon the interruption, Gray just came to sit in my lap, her warm body and sweet face bringing comfort and companionship.  Oh, how I love her!  And I do promise, once I can find it, to post a picture I took of her a few months back.  Lacking that, I will take another soon so you can see this kitty who receives my love and gives hers back to me!)
So as I was saying, I now plan to sit quietly, absorbing the energy of the Angels I feel around me; to see with clear eyes and to hear with ears attuned to the Love that is All in All!
Thanks for it all!