Dichotomy, paradox or ? ? ?

Good Sunday morning, dear readers! 
Have you ever wondered, I wonder, about how to reconcile these two prevalent adminitions?  "Don't be a human doing, be a human being" and "Actions speak louder than words"?  One of my mother's favorites was "Who you are speaks so loud I can't hear what you are saying".  So, which is it?  Or is it both?  Or is it none of the above?  Personally, while I love to hear the words "I love you", I truly want and need to have the actions of the speakers be consistent with the words.  I want to show those I care about, with what I do, as well as with what I say.  One of my favorite words around this idea is "congruence".  There needs to be a match.  There needs to be consistency.  I sure would be interested in hearing/reading what you may have to offer on the subject.
I send good wishes and prayers your way, today!  May the sun shine warmly on your face, the rain fall softly on your head and the wind blow gently on your back (or words to that effect!).
Thanks for it all!